Utter Shit

Today was even better.  I am pretty zen right now.  I am aware of what I can and cannot control and for now I am ok with it.  It did not hurt that I changed my fb pic and he marked that he liked it – which was the mother-effing point.  And it was a good picture – I look happy.  I had good hair.  And the pic is just fuzzy enough to be dreamy and not show any wrinkles!

What I did do today was make a decision that has not ONE thing to do with boy drama.  I went to work in my fave wide leg jeans.  They are too large, but so comfy.  And I was in a nice tee and my stupid flip flops.

And I decided this morning I was done dressing so casually.  I ended up at an Ann Taylor outlet, on my way to the Nordies Rack.  I went nuts – new jeans (2 pairs OF SIZE EIGHT so I can have one shortened for flats and leave the other for heels), 2 v-neck sweaters (small!), 2 cute cardigans and one tight ass pair of slacks (another 8).  There is a little pull in the thigh on all the pants, but that is just not avoidable – I am a thigh girl. And I am hoping another few weeks of kickboxing will fix me right up!

I might go back for more slacks – they have a straight fit (which I bought) and a curvy fit that I think will work better.  They just did not have any in my size.

I think this stems from yesterday where I wore a pair of Level 99 jeans from Anthropology (that I love) and the belt loop is coming off because I grab them and haul them up too often.  I am going to take all of my larger jeans and wash and dry on hot/high and see if they will shrink a bit.

It also comes from looking at fb last night and finding and old best friend who looks gorgeous and so…with it.  I mean, she looks good with her younger foreign husband (that bitch).  Cute hair, good makeup, fab clothes.  There is no reason I cannot pull it together a little but, right?

And it comes from looking through (mostly bad) pics of myself and realizing I need a fucking haircut.  I always look better with a fresh haircut – that man knows what he is doing.  I had been growing it out and seeing him once every 12 weeks.  Then it was once every 10.  I had intended to move it to once every 8…only we are at 11 weeks tomorrow.  Ugh.  No wonder I am all pony tail all the time.  I still want to grow it out a bit more, but it needs a new shape.

For the second time in 2 weeks I cleaned out my closet – there is just so much that I will not wear!

Right this moment I have 2 pairs of jeans (new), 2 pairs of jeans (older and slightly loose), and 3 pairs of slacks that will fit.  I need to have 3 of the 7 hemmed.  I have oodles of shirts and sweaters.

But what I really need to do is learn to accessorize.  Then I would be set!