Filed under: Life in the Burbs
Goddamn it all! Like I am not stressed enough right now!
(ready for the whining?)
My silverware drawer broke. And like the piece of white trash than I am, I pulled the drawer out, placed it on the stove and put a towel over the hole so the cats would not try to jump through it.
I guess I will go to Home Depot and see what magic I can create.
Last night I attended a meeting with the lawyers, architects and contractors for the lawsuit in my townhouse complex. I believe I have mentioned before that I bought while we were in a lawsuit, which has now been settled.
Bring on the construction zone!
Of course all my idiot neighbors were there – making sure their piddly little things would be corrected, seeing this lawsuit as a way to never have to maintain their own homes. I sat in the back with the president of the HOA and a neighbor I have known for 14 years making snide remarks like “I think the HOA owes us all granite slab!” and then snickering loudly and popping jujubees into our faces.
The neighbor and I went through the offered drinks and noticed what was missing – “I see coke, but no rum….”
Anyway, what I learned is that this is going to SUCK more than I thought. All units will be stripped of most of their siding and trim, all of the sliding windows will be replaced, all balconies replaced and they need to crawl into my attic space to see if there are fire walls between units…and one woman brought up a good point – in my unit, they have to cut into the ceiling for that. Wheeee!
Then they will paint.
Oh and! They will take up all of our guest parking with forklifts and containers of product. AND there will be times when you cannot get to your own garage. GOOD TIMES!! For one year. One year of construction.
I hate it when you give an inch and they take a mile.
I made the mistake of twittering about the boy with the mom over lunch yesterday. We laughingly joked about the ‘wedding” and dreamed of never telling my brother until he received the invite.
It was a fun afternoon. And now I am paying for it.
She has called me more than 4 times in the last 3 hours to chat about stupid shit – like to read me the emails about him with her best friend.
I just blew my top when she asked me if I had told a co-worker. I had a meeting with the colleague who was having a time-crunched day. I did not think it appropriate to gossip when we had an agenda that needed to be addressed, quickly, so she could get back to putting out fires.
What the mom wanted to know, but would not ask, was could she call the colleague and joke about the impending wedding. I told her I had not had an appropriate opening to tell this friend that I am seeing someone, but if she felt like she needed to, please go ahead.
Then I slammed down the phone.
She is treating this like a new toy. And allowing her to daydream is putting un-needed pressure on this situation. Lesson learned. She is on a need to know basis. Keep my damn mouth shut.
Filed under: dating
I have tried to write this more times than I want to count. I keep trying to write about how good I am at being single. I try to whine about how my schedule has been upended and the lack of sleep. I want to complain about how I have not cooked a meal at my house in weeks and how I miss my alone time.
But the truth is – I can’t. He does not seem to want to go away – and I think I am ok with that.
I have never been this comfortable with another person. I know that I am totally accpeted. He does not want me to be thinner or more successful or less bitchy. He likes ME. Which of course proves he needs medication!
We can discuss anything – and have. From babies to weddings to retirement to pre-nup’s to health issues to life insurance. Seriously. And it does not feel weird to talk about these things.
Can you tell I am all PMS-ie? I am scared. And it brings me to tears.
*I found $10 (see previous post) and thank god because the shit cost $30 not $25 (and then $5 for the tip). I am so living in 2004. I go every 2 weeks…one would think I could remember how much it freaking costs to get a manicure/pedicure.
So…big date night. Going to see the young pups pad. I try to get all dolled up. I naired things, people. Nair. I am not good with Nair, so it now looks like some slash and burn tactic happened around my nether regions. Hawt.
I shower, use the good shampoo and the good conditioner…. then I decide that all this newly smooth(ish) skin should be super soft, and opt to take a bath with my new favorite bath oil. Yeah…uh huh….that’s riiiiiiiight….oil it up. (channeling Barry White, again).
I bought a new hair dryer and used the round boar bristle brush for volume – going for big sexy hair.
Only I guess I should have been more careful with the oil, because I think the back of my hair rubbed on my shoulders and now my freshly washed and dried hair looks dirtier than when I started an hour ago. I look greasy people.
Sigh…it hurts to be me sometimes.
Filed under: Being Mere
I want to go get a pedicure and a manicure.
I have $25 in cash on me.
I need $30.
I do not want to go to the bank because I am lazy.
So instead I ransack closets and purses and the car and jackets and pockets for $5.
No luck yet.
Filed under: Pbbbbt
The tranquilizers did not work. The cat lost his ever loving mind at the vets office, and all I can say is THANK GOD for long sleeves. He bit me THROUGH a sweatshirt where I am now sporting 4 puncture wounds and a swollen bruise.
Next time, they want to use Ketamine. The vet liked my joke about giving him roofies next time, she said Ketamine is much like a roofie. See? I could have been a vet.
They had a vet tech come in and hold him down with a towel and then thought about muzzling him. MUZZLING THAT SWEET FACE…that sweet face now spitting and biting and yowling.
**
Yesterday, a friends house closed. I went over to help her test 18 colors of paint on the walls. And drink beer. And then go have cocktails. And chicken strips.
When I came home, my eye hurt. I let it hurt for awhile, sort of rubbing at it. Then I got the 10x mirror out to see what was bugging me. I had an eyelash poking into my eye, sort of resting in the corner so that one end was directly in my eye. I did not think much if it, grabbed some tweezers and pulled it out.
This morning my eye is sore. Really sore. And red. Really red. I tried eye drops – no luck.
**
Still boring, aren’t I? I will work on that.
Filed under: raves
You may have noticed I like my hair. I think it is my best feature and being a redhead has always set me apart. So I am a shampoo WHORE!
I am one to use the small bottles of expensive stuff, but I am always on the look out for a grocery store brand that will give excellent results.
Recently I got Pantene’s Ice Shine conditioner. And I finally used it today. Di-vine. Smooth shiny straight hair. Love it. Go buy it.
Filed under: Pbbbbt
The townhouse complex I live in was in litigation when I bought this place. The builder had gotten bad siding, bad nails, bad windows, that kind of thing. We won, and the money is in the bank awaiting the HOA to pick a contractor and have all the little items fixed. Well, maybe not so little…but it isn’t foundation or drainage work – which would SUCK.
My unit was inspected during my escrow by 12+ contractors, all with an adjoining lawyer. This place was a zoo, and they cut holes in ceilings to see the firewall between the units, flooded my balcony, tested windows, and placed magnets on walls to see how many nails had been used in each stud. It was a 4 day process and there were often 10 people standing in what is now my bedroom. It was a calculated risk I took in order to afford a 3 bedroom with a yard and 2 car garage. I am the only ‘client’ I have allowed to buy into litigation.
The unit next door to me has had a lot of issues. Mine were all fixed during that inspection process, other than the siding. I drove up after my jog this morning and there were 2 men with the lady who lives next door in her garage. I sort of recognized that they were contractors, but they have been floating around for months, so it does not raise much suspicion.
I come upstairs, email the mom and strip down to get into the shower. And then I hear someone walking on the roof. I go to the slider in my room and there is a ladder RIGHT NEXT TO MY WINDOW. Mind you, I am naked. I quickly shut the shutters and keep an eye on the windows that are not covered in my shower while I shampoo my hair.
Don’t ya think some notice is due? Maybe just a ‘hey, gonna be on your roof, might want to shut your windows’ might be nice?
Filed under: dating
On our little trip to Santa Cruz the young pup asked me if I had ever been close to marriage. I laughed, my favorite bitter little laugh and mumbled something about never while clothed.
The truth is, there was Ian. I was 21, maybe 22. He was 30. Or he turned 30 while we were dating. My friend was dating his friend and roommate. We met at the restaurant that I worked at…we called him a bar fly. Rumor was that he had some huge trust fund that he would have access to when he hit the big 3-0. He worked in computers. And we had the time of our lives.
We drank copious amounts of booze and went bowling. We were a fun little foursome, 3 blonds and the redhead. We laughed. A lot.
He was the first guy to ever take me out of town and we went to Tahoe for a night or a weekend, I can hardly remember. What I do remember is pointing to all the little chapels, an on-going inside joke between the two of us, and somewhere in the back of my head really wanting to go through with it.
Thankfully, we laughed it off. Instead running through the snow to the hot tub.
We broke up on his 30th bday – the night after I took the four of us to SF for a fantastic meal and fancy hotel rooms. In the car on the way back he asked the friend’s girlfriend to attend his family bday party…he did not ask me. And it occurred to me that as close as he was to his sister and mother I had not met either of them.
He slept with my boss the next night.
I just saw him in Blockbuster, not an hour ago. He has to be 40+ now. The age wearing well on him. Never a traditionally handsome man, he had something that worked for me. It could still work for me.
I happen to know he is married with kids. I also know his wife likes to get drunk and tell people she used to date beautiful men before marrying him.
He lives blocks from my folks, and I have seen him in his car once or twice. But without the cars between us, I could still feel that chemistry we once had. I get why I loved him.
I pretended not to recognize him, though I am sure he saw me see him. The what-if’s play through my head.
